I’ve been down in the dumps lately and I think I know why. You see my life has been really busy lately with volunteer commitments, work deadlines and kiddo activities. And when my life starts getting busy and a little hairy, I let a few things slip. Sometimes it’s the important things that slip – like friends, family members, GOD.
So I got busy and when I wasn’t running here, there and yonder trying to get it all accomplished, I decided to sleep in a little later instead of spending my one-on-one time with my coffee and my Bible. Big Mistake! You see while I was busy, while I was distracted, the devil was not. The red-horned, awful thing was very focused on bringing me down. And he succeeded! While I was preoccupied, I started thinking bad things about myself. That jerk sat on my shoulder and whispered ugly words into my ear. He had me believing that the “friends” I had really weren’t friends at all. He had me believing that I wasn’t good enough. He had me counting other people’s blessings instead of my own.
And the thing was I knew this was happening. I could feel it happening but I wasn’t sure what to do about it. I was busy, remember?
The evil, little creep kept finding holes in my armor, holes in my heart to bring me further down. And when the jerk was bringing me down with his awful mind games, I started losing patience with my friends, with my family members, with my kiddos, with the bank teller, with the traffic light, with it all. I became angry, aggressive and irritated. I was in a hurry 24/7. Oh and that devil was smiling and was so happy about all this anger!
Like I said, I could feel the enemy near me, beside me and around me. I could feel him perched on my shoulder waiting for him to attack. I was so distracted with all my busyness, yet I could still feel his presence.
And then I figured it out. Things flourish where you’ve got your attention. The garden grows where it’s watered. I got mad this time – really mad and really angry-- at the one person who could do something about it! ME!
I was the one who was paying attention and giving notice to what the devil was saying! What in the world? You see, I was tired and cranky and distracted with busyness and the evil creep saw that as the perfect opportunity and he seized upon it.
Thankfully, I slowed down a bit and took a time-out of my rush-rush-rush schedule and said “ENOUGH”! I told the devil to step away.
Thankfully, when I finally slowed down enough, I remembered that my God is amazing in every way. He is so much bigger and stronger and more powerful than that teeny, tiny, little bitty, awful, evil devil could ever hope to be. The God I know whispers warm, affectionate words into my ear every minute of the day. I just need to slow down and take a second to hear Him. My God sends me love notes each and every morning in the form of a beautiful sunrise or in my babies’ smiles if I just slow down and take a minute to notice. My God is always telling me that I’m way better than “good enough”. My God made me and celebrates how wonderful I am each and everyday. While I can sometimes see a few things I’d like to fix, my God sees a perfect person and wants me to see and appreciate His amazing creation.
When things finally slowed down (a little at least), I decided the best thing to do to keep the devil away would be to dive back into my “coffee and bible” routine. And guess what happened? The more bible time I had, the more the holes in my heart started filling back up. Instead of viewing the cup as half empty, the cup again started appearing as entirely full. When I slow down and take a few minutes to focus back on my blessings (instead of paying attention to others’ blessings), I can see again that my cup is truly abundantly overflows!
While I know the devil continues to say his ugly words to me, I make the choice of who I want to listen to. Thanks to my early morning bible time, I've kicked the the jerk to the curb. His awful words have become muffled, faint, hardly audible whispers that I can't hear at all anymore. Like a train whose horn sounds so soft when it’s far away, I can hear my God quietly talking to me again. And I'm watering the heck out of that garden. As the train’s horn gets louder and louder the closer it gets, it’s the same with God. First it’s a whisper, then the more time you spend with Him, His love and His voice become a little louder and a little louder until at last He is as close as close can be and with a deafening, thunderous, wonderful shout, He yells, “Precious child! You are mine!”
If you are hearing someone, something talking negatively to you, recognize that that's the devil talking to you. Please don’t give that awful thing a second of your attention. Instead, seek ye first the kingdom of God and all good things shall be handed unto you. I know this. I read about it this morning over coffee.
